After meeting Keziah in China and all our early experiences with her, I was reminded of an author and speaker whose book I just loved -"The Way They Learn" by Cynthia Tobias
Fabulous read for parents...or anyone for that matter!
I have heard a Focus on the Family radio program where she discusses parts of this book several times. Love listening to her! She's so funny and makes so much sense.
In the section of the book she speaks the most about on the radio, she uses the Gregorc model of learning styles as one way to look at the differences in how people receive and process information, especially children and how they learn. The assessment looks at two different areas - perceptual quality and ordering ability. Perceptual quality is either dominately Concrete or Abstract. Ordering Ability is either dominately Sequential or Random. These are then combined to create four different learning styles:
Concrete-Sequential
Abstract-Sequential
Abstract-Random
Concrete-Random
Would you believe me if I told you that all four styles live in my house?
What I loved about Mrs. Tobias' presentation of these differing styles is when she spoke about the Concrete-Random learner. Though a strong-willed personality can exist in any of the learning styles (Oh yeah!), she has never met a Concrete-Random child or adult that was not strong-willed!
Here is a list from her "Ten Commandments for getting along with a CR"
* tell me "what" not "how"
* tell me what I did right, not what I did wrong
* point me in the right direction, then let me go
* be flexible
* know your limits, then push them
* don't be threatened by enthusiasm
* have a sense of humor
* be open to change
* keep me involved (we need responsibility and input)
CR's are described as not openly rebellious or defiant, only very determined to stay in control of their own lives. They have a nature that resists ultimatums. If you say "do this or else" CR's will most likely do "else". They may do it quietly, wtihout a fuss, but CR's know there is nothing they really have to do except die. Which, by the way, they are willing to do if necessary. Most other styles are not willing to perish over the small things, but CR's are.
Sorry if I don't have everything perfectly quoted. I wrote notes from the book almost a year ago and can't remember what I jotted down word for word.
Did you guess that Keziah is a Concrete-Random?
Love that girl to pieces, but I gotta tell you that she is one spicy little girl! Has been since before we met her!
She will push every boundary set. "No" for Keziah is not a limit; it's more of a challenge.
She cracks me up because she works so hard to do as little as she can at times.
I dearly love the teachers at the private elementary school my kids have all attended. They know all my strong-willed little stinkers and managed them well. Helped them learn and grow while bending, molding, and shaping those iron wills without breaking them.
Bring on Keziah!
First day of school for Keziah, when I came to pick her up after school, I noticed her shoe was untied and said, "Keziah, tie your shoe." The teachers all looked at me in shock, "She can tie her shoes?" All day long she had been conning all the boys to help her tie her shoes. Poor, pathetic, little con artist!
Then just last week, she was asked by a teacher (not her classroom teacher) before school got started to sharpen a bunch of pencils for the class. Suddenly, she didn't know what a pencil sharpener was or how to sharpen pencils. Keziah even asked, "Do I put my finger in that hole?" Would have loved to have seen her face when the teacher responded, "Why, yes, you do!" Keziah immediately questioned, "Are you kidding me!??!" "Why, yes. Yes, I am." came the response. Goofy girl!
Love all my kiddos! All their personalities and learning styles and all their uniquely, God-designed, strong wills.
Pssst...would you believe me if I told you that I think I live with two Concrete-Random kiddos? Makes life interesting!
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Oh, Hadassah Peiwu, waiting for you to come home is so hard! We are so ready to begin discovering who you are and all about you. Come home quickly! I need you to set Keziah straight about a lot of stuff - your favorite color, favorite foods, likes, dislikes. I think words like "obstinate" and "impatient" in your referral file just mean that you're gonna fit in perfectly with our mixed up mess around here. Love ya, Baby Girl!




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