Conundrum

I'm perplexed...again.

How many kids do I have? 

There is just not an easy or a short answer to this question right now!

My heart was so soft and tendered last May when Josiah was doing a sound level check for the children's choir musical at church.  He was asked to list the names of all his brothers and sisters.  Without  any thought, he listed off four names and then added Hadassah his sister in China.

Christopher has taken to just telling people we have six kids.  No disclaimers or great detailed explanations.  He just says we have six kids.

But still I struggle at times.  I do have six kids!  Everyone in our house knows that answer.  We just don't yet have number six living at home or the legal paperwork and documentation that states what we already know - Hadassah Wade is our daughter/sister.

For now, I have five kids living at home.  Five kids to feed, clothe, outfit with school supplies, and shuttle around to and from activities.  I have five kids in five schools (don't even get me started on the insanity of this).  I have five kids who play flutes, violins, pianos, football, soccer.  They dance, act, and sing.  They fight and squabble and love each other.

...and we're waiting for number six to join in the madness of daily life....

Yesterday, I finally remembered to return some phone calls (email me or text me...I'm much better about responding to these).  It's time to update the neighborhood directory!  The wonderful person in charge of this wanted to make sure she had all my kids listed because she knew we had adopted at least one since the last publication.  So Keziah's name will be added...but not Hadassah's.

In my head I understand this.  Really I do.  It would be like adding the name of a baby not yet born.  Things can happen, so you wait. 

But in my heart...I have six children.  Six beautiful (and handsome), special, unique, incredible, talented, gifted, goofy, and wonderful blessing!

Hadassah, you name may not be written on lists or documents or papers, but it is etched into the hearts of your forever family.  We love you, and we long for you to be home.