Lovin' My Little Onion

Some of our cultural exposure for Keziah is a little off the wall at times.  There are some movies that we watch along the way to give her a taste of what other kids her age have seen or know about.  Last weekend, we started with the first "Shrek" movie.  Okay, I'll agree...Totally lacking in "culture"! 

One part of the movie used an analogy though that has stuck with me this week - the onion.  How an onion can represent the layers of a person.  How to really know someone, you have to peel back the layers to discover more of who they are at the core.

Tonight, I experienced another moment when Keziah revealed something new about herself and her past.

In that moment, I remembered the onion. 

My precious little girl lived 6 1/2 years without her forever family.  Those years did not disappear.  Her life and her experiences before coming home are still a part of who she is today. 

At first, the language barrier prohibitted our discovering more about Keziah's former life.  However, our little drama queen did act out some incredible scenes and fascinating stories.  Now, as her language grows, she has more stories to tell, more memories surface.

My little onion peels back layer after layer.  Spicy girl that she is, some of these layers burst with flavor.  Some are sweet.  Too many though bring tears to my eyes.  They sting.  They burn.  They hurt.  Some are so very painful for me.

Tonight was a hard one.  One that leaves me wanting to cry endless tears.  I wish at times I could erase these parts of her life, take away hurts and memories.  But I can't.  These are also part of who she is.

So, where do we go from here?

We've planted our little onion deeply into the firm soil of her forever family.  We will continue to nurture and love her while we watch her grow.  The journey ahead seems long and difficult at times.  I know that many more tears will be shed.

Love you, Keziah, my little onion.